It’s not always easy, but the benefits of forgiving — and ‘forgetting’ — can be powerful.
Here are a few reasons why you should forgive someone———
Forgiveness just means that you’ve made peace with the pain, and you are ready to let it go.
Forgiveness is not something we do for others – it’s something we do for ourselves.Not forgiving someone is the equivalent of staying trapped in a jail cell of bitterness, serving time for someone else’s crime.
Gandhiji said “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” It takes a strong person to face pain head-on, forgive, and release it.
. Forgiveness isn’t always about others – it’s also about forgiving yourself.Guilt never makes anyone feel better. So always remember to forgive yourself and move on.
To forgive someone is the highest, most beautiful form of love.You might just find that you get a sense of peace and happinessin return
“Always forgive your enemies. Nothing annoys them so much.”
Letting go of anger and bitterness can work wonders for both your attitude and your health, not to mention your relationships.
Here are few strategies to free us from our resentments which we should start from today it self—–—-
Say a Prayer
whenever angry feelings about a person who’s harmed you enter your mind, tell yourself: “We are all good, loving, peaceful, powerful souls who occasionally get lost.” Pray for this person to find their way back to a happier place
Focus on Gratitude
Resist you of seeking happiness from the outside in! Happiness must always be an inside joy! When you are tempted to focus on all the ways the world has done you wrong, instead count your blessings by making a list of few aspects of your life that you appreciate. It is good practice to purposefully end your day this way to keep focused.
Maintain Perspective
If you’re going through a challenging time, remind yourself that this unfortunate event is merely a part of your life—not your “whole” life. Don’t let the event overwhelm you.
Learn the Lesson
Develop a mentality that you will never be a victim of a particular happening. Vow not only to dissociate yourself from emotionally harmful situations, but also to consciously avoid similar situations in the future.
Let Go of Resentment
“Resentment is the poison you swallow hoping the other person will die.” Recognize that when you resent someone, you are not only hurting yourself, you’re also giving this person control of your emotions.
Stay Cantered
Recognize that when you respond with hate to hate, anger to anger, bitterness to bitterness, you are ironically becoming part of the problem. Choose to resist becoming like them and instead put in always sincere effort to remain a loving, peaceful and happy person.
Get Revenge Positively
. If you train yourself to consistently be more loving in thoughts and actions, your energy will attract more positive people and positive results. To stay focused on highly positive thoughts, repeat this meditation ritual throughout the day: “Love, forgiveness, letting go, peace.”
Think of all of the good things the person did for you.You may be really hurt by whatever your mother, sister, significant other, or friend did to you, but try to think about all of the great things that person did for you too. Make a list of all of the great things the person did for you and all of the memories you shared. Refer to it when you’re feeling angry or resentful if you need to.
Put yourself in the person’s shoes.
Try to see the situation from that person’s perspective. May be the person who hurt you really didn’t mean to do it and is feeling really, really horrible about everything that happened.
Remember that there are two sides to every story. You may feel like the complete victim, but you might have hurt the person, too.
See ifyou’veever wronged the person.
Look at the flip side. Remember that time when you completely forgot your sister’s birthday and went drinking with your friends instead? Chances are that you’ve caused some pain in the past, and the person managed to get over it. Relationships are long and complicated, and it’s likely that pain has been caused by both sides.
Know that forgiving actually relieves stress.
Various studies have shown that being unforgiving and dwelling on the injustices that were done to you can actually raise your blood pressure, increase your heart rate, make your muscles tenser, and lead you to be much more stressed out than if you worked on forgiving the person instead. Cultivating feelings of forgiveness has been shown to make people feel calmer and more emotionally stable. So, if you want to be selfish about it, then know that forgiving the person will actually make you feel better physically and mentally. And who doesn’t want that?
The longer you hold on to your angry feelings, the worse your body and mind will feel. And why do that to you?
.Putting It into Action–———
Give yourself time to cool off——–
Even if you make the decision to start forgiving today, Giving yourself a bit of time to heal and reflect can help you figure out what to say to the person when you do talk and can keep you from getting too angry and saying something that you’ll regret.
Accept the person’s apology——-.
Talk to the person and make sure that he or she is truly sorry and that his or her feelings are truly genuine
Remember that there’s a difference between accepting the person’s apology and forgiving him or her fully on the spot. You can accept an apology and then give yourself more time to get over it.
Show compassion————
You may not be feeling very compassionate toward a person after he or she has harmed you. But if you want to rebuild your relationship more quickly and make both of you feel better, then you have to show compassion for how the person is feeling. Think about how terrible the person feels for hurting you and recognize that nobody’s perfect; the person is likely suffering a lot without your love and kindness, and that’s surely taking a toll on him or her. Even if you were wronged, you should take the high road and recognize that the person is upset, too.
What should we do when we are deeply hurt by someone ————-
Rebuild your trust.Take things slow with the person and work on repairing your relationship.. Take things slow and hang out in low-pressure situations while giving each other space to be alone.
Focus your energy somewhere else Enjoy your relationships with people who haven’t hurt you. Find something else that makes you really happy and that you can look forward to, and you’ll spend less time feeling the pain.
One day, you may look as see that hey, the pain is no longer there anymore. You might have thought that would never happen, right?
Staying busy will keep you moving forward and having positive things to look forward to. happened.
Take time to reflect.Though staying busy and active will help you heal faster, being quiet with yourself can help you figure out how you really feel about the situation; the faster you know exactly what you think, the faster you can move forward.
Plan a weekly or bi-weekly date with yourself when you have nothing to do but spend time with yourself. This will help you calm down, think, and get rid of those angry feelings.
Know that only positive revenge is worth it.You may be so hurt that you want to get the person who hurt you back to make him or her feel the same pain that you felt. However, this will only make you feel more stressed out, angry, and bitter, and it won’t solve anything. If you really feel the need to seek vengeance, then know that the best revenge you can get is just to live a great, accomplished life, to be happy, and to not let what happened get to you in the end.
Just live your life and enjoy being yourself and doing the things you love to do. If you spend all your time trying to make the person who hurt you feel terrible, and then you’ll never be able to go on.
Move forward instead of looking back.Focus on the future and, have gratitude for all of the people who do make your life great and all of the opportunities you have and think about all of the wonderful things that lie ahead.
Focus on the goals you want to meet in the future that will make your life even better. Make a plan for achieving them instead of thinking about all of the things that went wrong for you.
You have made a choice to forgive and forget, and you should be proud of yourself for doing that, even if it takes longer than you hoped to get there.
Some Important Quotations about Forgive and Forget——-—
It takes a strong person to say sorry, and an ever stronger person to forgive.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
When you forgive, you in no way change the past – but you sure do change the future.
– Bernard Meltzer
“It is the fragrance that flowers give when they are crushed…” Gandhi
It takes a second to make a mistake, but a lifetime to try and forget it was your fault.
– Jenn
What’s done is done
Make room for the new
Forgive and forget
what has been done to you.
– Shanna and Nicole
When you truly love someone, you forgive the unforgivable
Everyone makes mistakes. But what we have to do is learn from them, forgive the people who hurt you, apologize to the people who you hurt, forget about them, and move on.
– Brianna Poncsak
Being human means you’ve made mistakes.
Being humane means you forgive others for the ones they’ve made.
– Susan Gale
Forgive others, not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace.
– Unknown
Concluding remarks——–
The process of forgetting is more difficult than the process of learning
. One should become POLITE and should give thanks to other for what they have done for you. Give thanks to your PARENTS (Who have blessed you with your body and life).pay thanks to your TEACHER, GOD and MOTHER EARTH too.
Lord Krishana is very much correct when he says that you may do something good for someone, but never expect anything in return, otherwise you will face disappointment.
Do well and forget it.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
Those who forgive are happier and healthier than those who are resentful. Forgiveness is part of AHINSA (अहिंसा ). It helps us over come anger and hatred.
Compiled and edited by J.K. Garg